Dear Grace,
This week, I am going to be talking about a difficult topic: sexual abuse. I think that this is an important topic for you to have enough information on. I also recognize that it is a hard one to read about. If you are not in a place to read this letter today, feel free to skip on to the next part of Grace Notes.
One in four women and one in six men have been or will be victims of sexual assault in their lifetime. This can even affect children. It is deeply distressing to hear about people being harmed in places which should be safe, like in families or churches.
The United Church of Canada has taken the step of making a Sexual Misconduct Prevention and Response Policy. The goal is to create a safer church structure. The policy also gives the church a plan of what to do if someone does report sexual abuse, so that people in leadership know how to respond to seek safety for all. You can read the policy here:
https://www.united-church.ca/sites/default/files/resources/sexual-misconduct-prevention-response.pdf
At Grace United Church, our regular Sunday School teachers and VBS leaders have all completed police record checks. We always make sure that there are at least two adults in the building at Vacation Bible Camp. Institutions like churches have a responsibility to take seriously the safety of all.
We recently got a new book at church. It is called God Made All of Me and is intended for parents to read to their children. The authors are parents Justin and Lindsey Holcomb. Lindsey has a Masters of Public Health and counsels victims of sexual assault and domestic violence. Justin is a minister and professor of theology.
They write: “We wrote this book as a tool so you can explain to your children that God made their bodies. Because private parts are private, there can be lots of questions, curiosity, or shame regarding them. For their protection, children need to know about private parts and understand that God made their body and made it special. (…) While we know that actions by adults can be more effective than expecting children to protect themselves from sexual abuse, children still need accurate, age-appropriate information about child sexual abuse and confidence that parents and caregivers will support them.”
This book will not be on the bookshelves at church, because it is intended to be read by parents with their children. Parents will know best if and when this book would be helpful to their families. If you would like to borrow the book, it is in my office.
In Quebec, two resources are the Kids’ Help Line ( 1 800 668 6868) and a bilingual 24/7 line for victims of sexual assault and their loved ones (1-888-933-9007).
Again, I know that this is a difficult topic. If you have thoughts about the steps the church can take to continue to be a safe environment, or if you want to talk about anything else, please feel free to give me a call (819-593-1112).
Blessings,
Natalie